I meant it, I'll love you fore ever

And it still holds true. After all thats happened in life, my first true love has stayed with me for over 20 years. That crazy intense pure love you showered me with is still there, in a special place, nice and safe. I'll carry that love with me as I move forward, as I love again, and again.

I've put you up on a pedestal, and then knocked you down. But when all is said and done I've loved, hard fast pure and true. I recognize the same in other couples, not all, some, and its not rare, but its not common. And its something I experienced after only dating you for a few months. Intense pure love.

I know these things are real.

Mujer latina son las más bellas del mundo Me considero una persona muy alegre. La edad de un hombre de la apertura de la puerta del coche de su fecha, y teniendo en su mano cuando sale no es una época pasada. Como ya someterse a una renovación personal, recuperar mis sueños, el papel de los dados del romance, en medio de la peor crisis económica en 70 años sigo siendo impulsado a diario en mi búsqueda del amor verdadero, puro.

Some disparate points:
This summer I started a period of renewal for me. I believe in love at first sight, it happened to me once, though it took me 4 dates to realize it, :-). I was raised by a single mom and I only want the kind of 50/50 emotional relationship she ultimately found and still enjoys to this day. I want that higher level of communication, where phrases, and body language can mean whole paragraphs, and that results in no arguing. I want to find a woman who has a beautiful heart & soul, a soul that has a pleasant flavor.

I've had these things before, I know they are real. All this, a great smile, incredible eyes, hips & legs will start a fire in my mind body and soul.

Getting over that old flame

I hadn't really thought about Michele much over the years, but the summer of my epiphany brought back much in the way of memories, desires, blame and regrets. I wondered when it would end, and this week it started to fade. The bad news is the girl I experienced pure true blue love with, willingly walked into an abusive relationship, years later divorced and looks to be dating a man built like her father, who taught her that abusive behavior is love, in the first place.

That is not the beautiful girl I knew. Its real hard to desire her, as gorgeous as she looks at 48 years old.

Today I spent the whole day thing about this girls profile at match.com, 49 years old, shes from Long Island, my old stomping grounds, but 40 miles from Montclair NJ. But now I'll have to pay for a membership, just so I can send her a message.

A story of personal renewal

I am a new man, during my 51st summer I learned to love myself. Kelly Rowland's song "When love takes over' is now my song, her song has become my anthem about beating that little boy with bad self esteem. I threw him under the bus, hopped in the bus and pulled K-turns over him until he was paste, his ghost still haunts me, but only rarely.

Love has taken over my life, love for myself. I'm smiling a lot more. As Kelly sings, I wonder if it shows.

It’s complicated, it always is
that’s just the way it goes
Feels like I’ve waited so long for this
I wonder if it shows?

This blog will chronicle my efforts at personal renewal in the middle of the worst economic period in a hundred years, as I at 51 years old, with a crap job, no home, no future, no wife, no girlfriend, no home I own, no dreams, work to reclaim all of these things.




Now I'm going to have that beautiful life that I should have had. And I 'm going to be dancing the whole way To all you single girls, I learned my lesson, I shoulda put a ring on it.